The Potty Chronicles

Sometimes when you just let go, things fall into place, and happen when it is their time to happen.

Hannah is two and a half years old. I tried potty training her just after the two-year mark. She didn't have the patience. Well, not for me. If Madelyn had to go, then Hannah would be next to her on her little potty.  Madelyn thought she was hot stuff because Hannah would do it for her, but not for us.  After three days of no accidents, we tried big-girl panties.  She wet herself three times within four hours. We weren't ready.

We tried again three months later.  She would go for everyone but her mom or dad.  As much as I despised bribery, I resorted to stickers, candy, and even chocolate. No avail.

I was gearing up for another round with my toddler.  I told myself that I wouldn't quit no matter how many outfits we went through.  I hadn't mentioned my plans to Hannah, yet, though. I was going to surprise her the next morning with her Dora panties.

As I was washing Audrey in the tub, plotting my approach to Hannah, the bathroom door swung open.  Hannah marched in.

"Oh, bath time for Audrey? I take a bath!" She gazed the room, which took about two micro-seconds as it is only 4 feet by 6 feet, and announced she was going to potty first.

Whut? I shot her a glare of awe, confusion, and wonderment. Did I hear her say she needed to potty? I was totally skeptical. I thought she was going to sit on the lid of the toilet and pretend.  I couldn't help her at all because Audrey is a champion bubble swallower in the tub.  She likes to lunge and swallows water because she is so slippery. I had Audrey pinned with both arms and a foot, and managed to get a glimpse of Hannah.

Hannah opened the toilet lid, put the potty seat on, removed diaper, climbed up, peed, wiped, climbed down, flushed, put potty seat away, and shut the lid.

I was floored.  Well, tubbed, because I was nearly all the way in with Audrey so I could swing around to see the events unfold.

Hannah took off her dress and got in the tub.

She has been in pull-ups for four days now. She only had an accident at the day care because I forgot to tell them the exciting news.

I wonder what will happen when she slips Dora on.

I was telling Madelyn how happy I was that Hannah is doing so well on the potty. We were at the park pushing Audrey in the baby swing. Madelyn was in the sand burying her feet. I wanted to start a conversation. I couldn't think of much to say. I started to look at my hands.

"Wow! I need some lotion, Madelyn. My skin is peeling off. Remind me to put some on when we get back to the house."

"What? Skin?" Madelyn asked, completely innocent and a little grossed out.

I laughed so hard I about peed my pants.  She caught me. I had misspoken and my almost-seven-year-old caught it.

Then I got the giggles thinking about the irony of keeping Hannah from peeing her pants, and then I almost peed mine.